Behold, the Kitty of Doom! [entries|friends|calendar] Evil Kitty of Doom [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[13 Feb 2005|01:26am] Greetings! I just went on a fabulous 3 day vacation! The humans left the door open so I took the oppurtunity and trotted out. It was a beautiful 3 days, weather was decent for February. Sniffed some grass, rubbed my face on a couple sticks, defied physics by darting out in front of cars without getting run over... And recruited a few minions for my Quest of World Domination. Muahahhah**coughgackhairball**ahhaaaha!!!!! Then I see my face on a poster on your big human telephone posts. "MISSING" I figured my little mision was over, so I returned. Then when I came back the humans starting freaking out with the whole "OMG OMG THERE SHE IS SQUEE!". And then the incessant hugging began. And the rubbing and petting and squeezing. Good grief. Cmon man, it was 2 days of freedom. They never let me out of the house :( [1 Minion <--- Praise me!]

[07 Feb 2005|09:21pm] [ mood | curious ] I am very sorry, but I'm 100% positive that I am evil now, because it MUST be illegal to be this sexy. Oh and also I've been having a bit of an identity crisis.  The family (my slaves muahahahaa!) that I live with now got me from a friend when I was a mere kitten.  Now, at 3 and a half years old, I still don't know who my parents were.  Or rather, what they were.  I mean I know "cats", duh, but I'd really like to know what breed I am.  I was wondering if anyone out there in LiveJournal Land can tell me what kind of cat Evil Kitty of Doom  is? If you can tell me I'll spare your pitiful human life when me and my cat minions take over the world...? [5 Minions <--- Praise me!]

sjghosuegoa [04 Feb 2005|11:01am] [ mood | cold ] I'm COLD. And they don't want to turn up the freaking heater! REVENGE! I'm gonna go lick myself in front of their friends...or something... [5 Minions <--- Praise me!]

Meow Mix [02 Feb 2005|04:04pm] [ mood | amused ] You know those Meow Mix commercials? The ones where they have my brethren "asking for it by name" going "meowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeow" to that annoying little tune? Little do the silly humans know, they have their "pets" repeating "Daddy's got a leeetle weiner" over and over and over and over. Nyahahaha :D I nearly wet my pants when I saw it. Well, I don't wear pants...but I nearly wet...uh...the fur around my bottom...? I'm assuming they were going for something more along the lines of "I want my Meow Mix.". Which is actually "meowmeow meow mew". The space and mew make all the difference! So that's what they get. Humans really do butcher the kitty language. **shakes head pityingly** [4 Minions <--- Praise me!]

Meow! [01 Feb 2005|05:00pm] [ mood | MEOW ] Hi! You are a silly mortal human so you can't know my real name. You may just call me Evil Kitty of Doom. Or Darkness, but I prefer Doom because Darkness didn't fit in the space LiveJournal allowed. Oh, they will pay for that. No one thwarts Evil Kitty of Doom!! MUAHHHAHAHAAHAHAA - **gack, cough, snort** - AHAHAHAHAH!!!!!! **sniff** Okay, I'm good. Anyway, every Tuesday my "master" **scoffs at the silly term coined by silly humans to give them a sense of false superiority** doesn't have class. She's an 18 year old freshman in college who is quite lacking in the "life" department, so she taught was forced by my sheer will and power to open a LiveJournal account for me. And what I say goes. That is all. Oh yeah, and Puss in Boots is my Spanish lover. Thank you. [5 Minions <--- Praise me!]

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